Ok so I left off that the surgery was about to start.....
My adorable husband was brought in.....
There was a young Dr assisting in the surgery. I listened to my OB instruct him as he went. Very student/ teacher like. I just didn't even care. To be honest, I was as calm as a Hindu cow! I am assuming I was cut a little as I was asked "Did you feel that?" My response "Nope..not a thing". My OB then said "Ok..here we go".
How would I describe my c-section? Like a bumpy car ride. The table was shaking and to me it felt like a ride on a bumpy road. I had this HUGE light shining in my face and music was playing. I often thought about what was going on behind the curtain but it didn't phase me. I told you...MY DR. LONG ASS NEEDLE DID AN AMAZING JOB!
The anticipation of her was unreal. I felt butterflies...although I am sure it was a scalpel or something. I closed my eyes for one brief moment when they told me they were going to be pressing down to get her out. The four years of dealing with infertility flashed through my brain.....and then I heard this cry. This sweet angel like cry and I looked up and THERE SHE WAS! The light shining above her gave her almost a glow as I took in all I could in those brief moments. Her massive amount of hair was curly. She looked just like my husband. Tears were streaming. I instantly felt my infertile broken heart mend. It stitched up with each breathe I took. I prayed and I prayed and there she was, coughing out her amniotic fluid all over my face. I wouldn't have had it any other way.
Sweet Pea born 5:23 pm on 3/24/11.
For those brief few seconds time stood still....
....And then everything went fast.
I remember saying to my husband that she looked just like him. He was soon whisked away to watch her get cleaned up and weighed as I closed my eyes again to listen to her cry. She was brought over to me...I stroked her face....I'm not sure all the things I needed to say in that moment came out but god knows I felt them. "You are PERFECT". "We waited so long for you". "I love you more than anything or anyone I have ever known". "You finally healed my heart" "You made me exactly who I wanted to me...your mom". She was brought to the nursery and I made my husband go with her and videotape as much as he could. I knew my family would be seeing her for the first time through a window and I smiled....for as much as my husband and I wanted her...they wanted her too. As long as we waited, they waited too. They shared in our heartache and tears and deserved to share in our happiness.
I'll never forget the song that was playing when I got to finally take a deep breathe and realize my surroundings.
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
And the man at the back said
Everyone attack and it turned into a ballroom blitz
And the girl in the corner said
Boy, I wanna warn ya, it'll turn into a ballroom blitz
Ballroom blitz, ballroom blitz, ballroom blitz
So random...but instantly a new favorite song!
I laid there on the table....listening to the music with the big light shining in my eye and I pretended I was on a beach with the sun shining. I was just laying there tanning...and I actually think I fell asleep because the next thing I knew I was being wheeled into recovery and my husband was there to show me all the little videos he took of our Sweet Pea.
I was still feeling great but couldn't stop shaking so they had to keep giving me meds. After about 75 minutes I was finally being wheeled into the mother/child hospital rooms. I wanted Sweet Pea. I needed to hold her. I remember being pushed down the hall...visiting hours were just about over but as we turned the corner I saw my family...adoring my daughter and I felt so happy. They started to scream and yell and "woohoo" as soon as they saw us (We are very loud East Coasters). Everyone was telling me how beautiful she was and I was rolled to the window to see her.
We were brought down to the room and I immediately started asking for her. Each time someone came in...I didn't care who it was ..I wanted her! After a long wait (they were seriously overcrowded), she was brought to me and placed in my arms.
NOTHING HAS EVER FELT MORE RIGHT...IN...MY...LIFE!!!!
We were finally left alone! Me, my husband and OUR daughter.
My life was finally complete.....
(Part three to come tomorrow ..on our hospital stay)