I Went to the Jersey Shore and All I Got Was CRABS (of the Hermit type)!!

So if you know me...you know I'm really not a fan of reptiley things..or bugs...or any type of thing that moves that could hurt you.  So believe me, it wasn't a surprise to anyone MORE than me this weekend when while at the shore....I decided I wanted a hermit crab. 

Let's recall my encounters with a crab: 1) When I was younger, I was in the ocean at Atlantic City (that's EW on a whole new level) and I went out and felt this claw mark scrape the bottom of my foot.  My foot was bleeding...skin hanging off...IN THE SALT WATER.  You get the point.  If there was a shark...I would have been dead.  My parents tried to calm me down and convince me it was a shell...but it was a crab..i just know it! 2) A crab RUINED my time on the beach in St. Thomas because he was being a menace and snapping at everyone...and because of my first experience with one..I wasn't going to be that fool again! 

I hate crabs....I won't eat them....I despise everything about them!

There is just something about those cute little shells that sucked me in....I mean honestly...it's probably my need to care for SOMETHING alive.  I would love a puppy but my husband and I can not agree on the type of dog we would want and plus...I HATE when dogs have accidents and the house smells...I wanted something low maintenance and cute.

I found Spidey!  Spidey is a baby hermit crab....a CUTE LITTLE BABY.  He is this tiny little thing with a spiderman face on the back of his shell.  JUST TOO CUTE!  So the awesome "mama" that I am ...I got spidey some really cool living quarters...you know PINK gravel...PINK shell for food....PINK hermie hut...PINK tank!  I even bought my little Spidey a cute pink shell for him to grow into .....more on this later!

So I bought Spidey as we were leaving Wildwood.  We were meeting Carrie and her family for lunch.  I didn't really think this through.  I couldn't bring Spidey into the restuarant and care for him like Carrie cared for her son...so we hid Spidey in the car....covered the cage so the sun wasn't beating on it and left the windows cracked open for air. 

We were at lunch an hour when we decided to go.  I picked Spidey's cage up and NO MOVEMENT.  I sat him on my lap and watched for any type of movement and there was none.  I picked the shell up (YES I PICKED THE SHELL UP!) and tapped it...NOTHING.  I tapped his claws hoping they would move...and NOTHING.  I tried to get him to move for an hour....nothing =(.  I killed my first pet.

I'm going to be a wonderful mother!

My sweet adorable husband drove right to the pet store when we got home.  He said he was buying me a new crab.  We went into the store and all the crabs were MONSTERS....these HUGE mothersuckers!  I wanted a baby again...they didn't have one....so I had to settle for a teenager hermit crab with a REALLY cool pink blinged out shell.  Ok I can deal with this. 

To be honest, the new crab FREAKED me out.  It's too big...too reminiscent of the bastard that clipped my feet....but I wanted a hermit crab...so here it was.  I made my husband put the new hermit crab in the tank because let's face it folks...I'M NOT TOUCHING THAT THING!  The crab started causing mayhem in the tiny cage and was crawling over everything..much like Godzilla would a city! 

The Godzilla crab started to crawl over my poor little dead Spidey and I freaked out.  Just then...I saw the smallest movement from Spidey....HE WAS ALIVE!

Oh! My! God!  Now I have TWO! 

Cute Little Baby Spidey Crab!

Godzilla crab (but what a fabulous shell!)

Sleeping in their Hermie Hut!

Ok so here's the thing...The cage isn't big enough for GODZILLA and Spidey...poor Spidey keeps getting pushed around by GODZILLA.  Upon discussion with my husband, we decided that GODZILLA needs to go back to the pet store and make some other person happy.  I will be the first to admit that GODZILLA was a rebound.  I am not attached to that thing in ANYWAY.  It's really for the best for Spidey. 

Don't judge me!

Oh and remember how I told you that I bought Spidey a larger pink shell for him to grow into.  Well once, this happens...he will be having a gender change.  I ACCEPT MY CRAB FOR WHO HE IS.  His new name will be Spiderella! 


lindsey said...

That is the best story ever! I do have to admit I was shocked that my twin picked out a spider man baby but hey beggars can't be choosers :) and let's face it, we're beggars! thanks for the giggle I needed it!

Busted Kate said...

So glad that Spidey is ok! :-) Yeah, when you said you left him in the car I thought "uh oh, this isn't going to end well..." But it did! Sounds like he'll have a great home.

Goodyear Family said...

Yay! Spidey is okay! Great story, made my day brighter.

Suzie-Q T-Pie said...

HAHAHA! Awesome story! I'm glad Spidey was ok! :)

Whitney said...

Happy birthday!

Gail said...

Happy Birthday!! Enjoy every second of it with lots of cake and ice-cream!!

Tillie said...

can i tell you that I'm so jealous. I BEG my husband always to let me get a hermit crab. he NEVER lets me do it. {so green with envy right now} :)