7.16.2009

The fear of fat

OK lets face it...I'm not thin.....I deal with that EVERY TIME I look in the mirror. I deal with it every time I go clothes shopping and can't find anything to wear. I deal with it each time I eat because I know I have a serious problem with food. I deal with it every friggen day of my life........

so what is up with people making comments about it?!!?!?! Did you think I forgot? Do you think when I look in the mirror I have friggen blinders on? I see it jackass....I don't need stupid shits like you to remind me!! And Yes I am sensitive about it!

I swear the fear of fat is like the new racism, or sexism......Except it is "against the rules" to say things about either of those...but somehow completely acceptable to make fat jokes ...who cares how the person feels...they are fat anyway right?

I have my own anxieties about my weight...I don't need them reinforced by other people....Some people don't even realize they do it....." He's afraid I'll look like you"....and some people make comments to others thinking we won't hear them...." What happened to her? She BLEW UP"

So why is it acceptable to make those kind of jokes? Or to say those kinds of things? They hurt people!!! They sting so bad that they stay with you....The BLEW UP comment was made like SIX YEARS AGO and I still get the wanna-crawl-into-bed-and -hide-under-the-covers-forever feeling....How am I supposed to feel comfortable in my own skin with people always judging me?!?!

I told one of my best friends yesterday that I was going to start to have a positive outlook on life and not let stuff bother me ...Guess I have to start tomorrow........

1 comments:

Complicated Mama said...

f' em. you are a beautiful person inside and out.

cant say the same about many people.

ahh shhhit.. i just said f... so un-zen!

xoxoxo