5.15.2009

To the SHEMS in my life

Dear Shems,

I have held this in way to long so let my words speak volumes tonight.

I do not need someone in my life who is always in constant need for gossip....I have realized that it is the fuel to our "relationship" and I am sickened by it. I don't need to have to watch every word I am saying or every thought I am having because you tend to play the role of gossip columnist and I always have the juicy news story. I will never forget how I was once the subject of those whispers.

I do not need to be left hanging on this abandoned vine of our relationship, surrounded by your fake intentions and smiles. I always defended you! I never turned my back but I am tired of feeling guilty for my accomplishments because of your failures. I'm exhausted by "us". I stood under you, trying to catch you ..but my net wasn't big enough. I stood with my arms wide open, unconditionally accepting you, and you turned the other way. You turned you back on me. There is only so much I can be in the cold shade before I become frost-bitten.

You don't even realize how much time you are wasting. I hope you realize it tonight. It's time to grow up and and accept the roles that life has given you. They are some of the most amazing people in the world and their crushed hearts enrage me. Life is too short to not let all words be spoken...you will realize it one day...I just hope it isn't too late!

So much poison has built over the years, starting from when I was little. Hey are you listening LOUD and CLEAR? I HOPE I AM JUST LIKE HER!!! I know I am ...and you know I am and that's why I don't fit in. Those heart shaped rocks in your chest have made you void of all emotion. You didn't even care....You didn't even care that you crushed him. That is unexcuseable in my book....I am tired of feeling the pressure to always do the right thing.


So here is to you my shems...Its because of your conditional love, that I have learned to love unconditionally and its because of your lack of dedication, that MY real family means the world to me.

A Sincere Thank You from me!

1 comments:

Mommy In Waiting said...

Wow! Feel like you are writing about people in my life! Kudos to you for having the guts to write this!